


Beyond your shaky breath

by Veelitann



Series: The Heart of Paladins [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: After the battle, Confession, Fluff, Injured Lance, Langst, M/M, Realization, Sequel, allura is a cutie, angst a little but hell we love it, lance is craving for shiro, poor lance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-19 16:05:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9449420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veelitann/pseuds/Veelitann
Summary: Their last battle had been tough, and Lance didn't even remember what had happened in the end. Laying here in his not functionning Lion with wounds he didn't even dare look at, Lance was barely able to communicate until Shiro could eventually find him. Oh, if only...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the sequel to "The Paladin in Love!" 
> 
> It was a little harder to write it, I'm not used to that type of scene, especially in english as it's not my native language x)
> 
> But really, I hope you will like it! Lance being genuinely in love is just...Dears, he's so sweet!

"Oh shit--" 

 

His ears still whistled so much after that explosion, and Lance wasn't sure if he was able to properly heard anything right now. In Blue's cockpit, everything sounded muffled, almost quiet. In the speackers, nobody was talking, leaving a soft buzz resonnate all over him. The last deflagration had been so hard to take, yet he wasn't sure how he could be still alive. He could hear his own breath, shaky, hesitant, hard. His chest hurt like hell and he wondered if he had struck against the dashboard that hard when Blue got into the violent wave. 

 

Coughing a little, he pressed the button of the communication channel, with the hope that someone would answer quickly. He couldn't see clear around him; Red's monitors were dark and the windows had sligtly darkened due to the lack of energy. 

 

"Guys?" he tried. "Guys, is there anyone?" 

 

The buzz persisted and Lance felt his stomach getting slowly tied. He couldn't open the cockpit -he was in the middle of nohere now. Through the huge windows, he only could see the unusual amount of debris floating in the space. Did they made it? Did they, in the end, destroy that base they came for? 

 

His breath was coming back slowly, but the pain was still there, making him wince too much for his liking and the hiss in his ears was making him nervous. 

 

"GUYS!" he called even louder. Wasn't his com-channel working anymore? "Oh shit shit shit, don't tell me it's broken again--" 

 

His forefinger pushed hard on the button, again and again, the soft 'click' hitting his ears every time he made an attempt. It had to work, it would work, could it work in the end? 

 

Sometimes, the buzz sounded like it was a bit different and he almost jumped on it every time it happened, calling for anyone who could hear him. The silence in the speackers was unbearable, making his heart ache, making his guts twist almost painfully -and he could swear he wasn't sick _this time_. 

 

There was a sudden crackle in the speackers and Lance almost jumped on the board -too fast and his body screamed in pain for him, but he didn't listen, holding his breath to take the call. 

 

"Hey! Anyone? Please, answer!" 

 

"--ce?" 

 

The young man sucked in a breath at the familiar voice, not really carring if he didn't get what the man was saying. His heart had already made a loop at the sound of _that_ voice. 

 

"Oh, thanks god!" he sighed. 

 

He knew that his voice wasn't like usual, he couldn't scream, with his painful throat -had he screamed or anything? His lungs were so painful right now, keeping him from breathing too much, and he still didn't get what had happened when the giant canon had shot him -them? 

 

"Lance, you can hear me?" 

 

He sighed, swallowed slowly as a bit of relief was back somehow. 

 

"I can hear you, Shiro," he said. The name rolled on his tongue like sugar sprinkled in his mouth and he breathed deeply. 

 

"Are you ok?" 

 

Shiro's voice was a bit low, but he didn't sound injured or anything at first. Lance tried some other buttons with the hope that his screens would work back, but nothing happened. 

 

"I'm ok," he breathed. "I might have hurt myself a little but I guess it's nothing, we'll see when we're back..." 

 

In the microphone, Shiro's voice crackled a little and Lance feared for a second that he would lose the communication with the man. 

 

"Shiro?" he immediatly called. He couldn't suppress the urge in his tired and painful voice, but didn't really mind. 

 

"Sorry--Seems that the channel is a bit damaged. Where are you?" 

 

"I--" 

 

Lance glanced again at the darkened windows. 

 

"I don't know?" he shuddered. "There are debris all over, what happened?" 

 

He coughed again, wincing at the awful pain irradiating his chest and keeping him from hearing Shiro's voice clearly when the man talked. Hand clasped tight against his mouth, he tried to breath more slowly to calm down the sudden bursting in his lungs. 

 

"Hey Lan--Hey, are you really ok man?" The voice called again. 

 

"I'm ok!" He answered a bit quickly. But he knew he wasn't really, from the spots of blood lingering on his glove. "Oh shit--" he mumbled. Ignoring it deliberatly despite Shiro calling his name to know what was happening, Lance tried to move his lion again, carefully trying not to leave blood on the commands. "Nothing's working for now," he eventually sighed. "What about you?" 

 

A deep sigh answered in the speackers, then Shiro spoke again. "I was a bit farther, I wasn't hit by that shoot...Oh man, you fucking scared me!" 

 

Shiro's voice sounded a bit strangled when he talked and Lance had to paused a little to get the situation. But a sudden yet violent shake took him by surprise and his weak legs didn't carry him. He fell back on the cockpit seat with a hardy repressed scream due to his painful body and waited patiently for that new wave to stop. 

 

"Lance!?" Shiro's voice came out, so stressed that it should have made Lance smile. In another context, he would have laughed at the man, would have made a stupid joke about his useless and woncerned worrying, but really, now and there, he couldn't. 

 

"Something bumped into my lion," Lance said. "Please, don't yell Shiro, my ears are in fire, oh fucking god..." 

 

His breath was so unsteady and it was juste so hard to stand up again. His somehow blurry vision was taking on his nerves. 

 

"Oh, uh, I--I'm sorry," Shiro murmured. Lance shifted a little on his seat, tryng not to put too much blood on anthing -and it was pretty hard as he hadn't stopped spitting blood in his hand every time he cough. Too much, he disliked it. "I can't find you with my radar, how comes you're that far?" 

 

Leaning back on his seat, lance closed his eyes a little. Shiro's voice was a gift at that moment, even despite the pain. His soft tone was reassuring, no matter how on the edge he could sound right now. It was all Lance needed, to be honest -even if, ok, the healing cab would be welcome too. 

 

"I--" Lance shrugged then hissed at the pain. "Shit. I don't know. The blast must have projected Blue? There are...So much debris all around." He huffed a little. If he had to be honest, it wasn't only his chest that made him whine pitifully. His arm was tightened around his waist, pressing against his stomach and he had to admit that he was just too scare to give a look at it. As long as he didn't know what was going on with his own body, beyong the pain, he could endure it without being a crying baby. Really, he could. 

 

But still, it was unbearable. 

 

"Debris, you said?" Shiro's voice came out again and it almost made him jump. 

 

Oh shit. 

 

"Y-yeah. L-like...A lot..." Lance was suddenly fully aware of the situation. He didn't have to look down on his body -he could feel the blood on his arm and hands through the fabric of his suit. He wan't stupid. 

 

He knew that he had to stay awake as much as possible and that his body was alrady trying to fuck it up. 

 

"Lance? You sound weird, are you reall--" 

 

"T--talk to me!" Lance suddenly spit out. 

 

A breath answered him at first, a short silence that scared him. He might sound weird, asking something like that, out of nowhere, plus cutting Shiro in his words. It wasn't really of him; he was always taking care of what the man had to say, had to do, everyhing. But right now, the fear was just crawling in his veins. He could feel his heartbeat slowing down little by little to slow the flow of blood running out of his body and he was just so scared, like it was freacking him out so much. 

 

He needed Shiro to talk to him, to help him stay awaken. He couldn't stay by himself, he somehow knew it. 

 

"Lance, dude, what's happening?" 

 

Shiro's voice was soft, concerned, but the last part was all Lance didn't want from the man. 

 

"I--" 

 

He couldn't tell him, right? He couldn't tell Shiro how scared he was, like a child, how panick was rushing in his blood more and more every second passing by, how needy he was to see the man right now between two waves of pain going through his sore body. 

 

"--ce! LANCE! ANSWER!" 

 

He started at Shiro's voice, hard, an this time it was even more difficult. His shaky breath sounded awful and when he shifted on his seat, he could feel exactly where his wounds were. He just didn't want to think about it. Something from the cockpit might have pierced his body during the shock of the shoot. 

 

"LANCE! FOR FUCK'S SAKE ANSWER ME!" 

 

Lance cracked an eye open and at first, he tought he was having some nightmare. Blue was _functioning_. So were the communication screens. Something like 'Oh, shit' crossed his mind but "Hey, handsome!" was much more what first came out of his mouth when he saw Shiro's face on the monitor. The man paused a second, his face decomposing even more, pale with worrying. 

 

"What the--LANCE!" 

 

"Seriously, Shiro, I told--urrh--told you not to scream--" 

 

"WHY!?" 

 

Lance immediatly shut. Breathing was hard enough not to add some casual conversation. Or not too much. Instead, he focused on Shiro's face, studying his features with so much attention that he was pretty sure it would make the man pretty embarrassed. 

 

But Shiro didn't reproach him anything. Or rather, not that. 

 

"Minor injuries? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME LANCE!?" 

 

"Shit." 

 

"I'm coming, Lance, don't pass out again!" 

 

"I'll--do my best--" Lance muttered. Blue was back, and it felt a little more reassuring now, but his weak, shaky hands were unable to move from his bleeding waist. Here and now, he was kind of jealous of Keith and his strong bond with the red lion, the giant machine moving by itself so many times to save its paladin. Lance was close to his lion, of course. He could feel the machine, could feel its desirs, its inner thoughts, but it had never led both them to such an amazing bond. 

 

"Don't give up, buddy, okay?" 

 

"Mh--" 

 

"Listen to me, okay? LISTEN TO ME LANCE, OPEN YOUR EYES!" 

 

"Ah, yeah--" 

 

"I've found you, your lion has drifted due to the blast I think, hold on!" 

 

Lance kind of loved watching that anxious face of Shiro's. He knew that it wasn't someting to be proud of, really, but still, knowing that this expression was for _him_ and nobody else brought a hint of warmness in his painul chest. 

 

"Shit, I want to sleep." 

 

"Your eyes, Lance!" Shiro said again. "LOOK AT ME, BOY! ME! FOCUS ON ME! Don't leave me, Lance! DON'T FUCKING LEAVE ME!" 

 

Shiro's voice yelling in the speackers was awful, shaking with fear and anger at the sam time. Would he be mad at him for being that much hurt? Somehow, Lance hoped; but he wasn't sure anymore if Shiro would make it in time. If at first he'd not noticed his own wounds, oh well now the pain was the one taking him down. 

 

"I look at you," Lance whispered. "Like, see--I could do it forever?" he giggled a little at his weak attempt to loosen the atmosphere, theh coughed again and tightened his grip around his own body with a hiss. 

 

But here again, he was thankful. At least, he'd seen Shiro caring for him. Not for Keith, not for Pidge, not for Hunk, not for Allura, not for Caron. 

 

For _him_ , Lance. Him, who was only ' _the other guy from the garrison_ '. Him, who was nobody to Shiro at first when they met and it made him so desperate every time he thought about that nonexistent relationship. 

 

"That's great, Lance!" 

 

"Hey, Shiro?" 

 

"What? Talk, budy, it'll keep you awake!" 

 

Lance sighed, but even that simple thing was burning in his lungs, the deep wound of his waist. 

 

"I'm--sorry--?" Lance hesitated on the words to say. Thinking was something still in his abilities right now, but talking was another thing. Shiro growled and his concerned gaze flicked to the camera of his lion, visibly trying to get Lance's eyes. They didn't really match, no matter how hard Lance could stare at the man's eyes on the screen. It wasn't like watching him for _real_ , Lance knew it. 

 

"Sorry? You're _sorry_?" Shiro repeated slowly. 

 

"Tell Allura...That I am sorry, at least--" 

 

"Oh shit shit shit, don't pass out Lance! Focus, man! Stay with me! I'm almost there, ok? I'm coming, I'm coming for you! Stop saying such things like you won't make it! OPEN YOUR EYES, HEY!" 

 

Lance obeyed with a dumb smile. Or rather, he'd prefer it to be dumb. He knew it was just ending as a awful grimace of pain. His view was blurrier than before and it suddenly made him panick a little more, eyes opening wide. 

 

"Hurry--Hury up, Shiro--" He gasped. 

 

"Lance! I see Blue, I'm here, okay!?" 

 

"I need you--Please, I need you _so much_ \--Ah shit--I'm crying--?" 

 

"FUCKING CRY, LANCE! I don't mind! Cry! Talk to me, do anything, look at me, I don't know but don't fucking close your eyes!" 

 

Lance giggled weirdly again -he disliked the sound he made so much. His eyes were burning, so hard every time his lids swept on his eye-balls. Every time he blinked, he could see Shiro stop breathing like his whole life depended on it. 

 

It probably did. 

 

But no. 

 

"Hey, Shiro--?" he murmured. 

 

The lost and desperate gaze he earned was worth the suffering, at least. 

 

"Sometimes...There are things we can't get, y'know...?" 

 

"What, Lance? What is it that you wanted?" 

 

Shiro's voice was the best thing he'd ever hear in his whole life. It was sweet, deep. 

 

"Not sure...Which one I...Really wanted the most..." 

 

"Tell me all of them! All!" 

 

Lance wan't sure if he'd answered the man. He knew that a word, just one, had slip past his lips, but his mind was geting as blurry as his eyes, ears buzzing again. He wouldn't be one to confess, he'd told Allura. And he wouldn't change his mind. Not even if he was about to die. 

 

The last thing he heard were Shiro's screams in the speackers. The last thing he wanted to see was his face, but there he as unable to lift his head up again, his chin resting heavily against his collarbones. 

 

Ah, shit. 

 

He was tired. 

 

What he wanted, uh? 

 

Shiro's arms around him. His heat. Hearing his beating heart, even in a short, soft and feelingless embrace, from a soldier to another soldier. It would have been enough. 

 

Really.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They had lost track of Lance after the battle. But when Shiro finally found him, it wasn't for the best of him. Would he be able to make it and save he young man, after all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! Here is the second chapter for this part of the story! Oh dears, i'm so so so happy that you liked it until now! thak you soooo much for your so nice comments!! And kudos! And bookmarks! x_x
> 
> Still I have to remind that this is the second part of "The Paladin in Love", as it will help for Allura's behaviour! 
> 
> So well, now...Enjoy it <3 !!

The silence all around him was getting on his nerves. The communication channel wasn't working so well since the bursting explosion of the canon, and the fear that something had happened to his comrades was burning the back of his throat. 

From where he was, Shiro had seen it all, holding his breath as the explosion of the destroyed galra canon was spreading so fast that it as impossible to fly away fast enough. But...

But they'd seen the blue lion. They all did, and Shiro still could hear the awfully surprised, the _painful_ scream coming from Lance at that moment, when the blast had reached him. They heard it, and Hunk's voice yelling Lance's name was still resonnating in Shiro's ears. 

Hardly breathing under the stress and the sudden pressure, the soldier tried to scan around in search for the blue mechanic beast. 

He only found the yellow, the red an the green. 

Lance wasn't here. They couldn't reach him. 

"Shiro!" Keith's voice made him start, taking him by surprise as Keith's face appeared on the monitor. 

Behind the blue glass of his helmet, Keith expression was a bit -no, a lot- worried and it didn't do any good to Shiro's mood. He tsk'ed quickly, teeth gritted. 

"I know," the man mumbled. "Can you find him? I think my radar's down due to the blast." 

Keith shook his head and Shiro could see his gaze alternate quickly between the monitor and the windows that allowed to see the space all around them. 

"The radar can't get him...I can't see him either!" Keith hissed. "For fuck's sake, where's he gone?" 

Hunk's voice whined in the speackers and Shiro winced at it, before immediatly holding his grimace back. He couldn't let himself get that easily down. It would be ok. It wasn't the first time that one of them was disapearing during a battle, no matter how, and they always managed to make it together in the end. But everytime it happened, Shiro could feel his heart beat, fast and loud in his chest, and the fear that he would lost someone always took him appart, making his stomach twist awfully. 

All around them, debris from the galra base were floating in the air as if nothing had happened, as if it had always been like that before, as if there hadn't been the explosion nor the fight nor the giant galra cannon. 

The asteroids belt flying all around the planet was all they could rely on and it didn't allow them a lot of possibilities. It restricted the view they had and Shiro already could feel the young man's impatience growing. 

He touched the digital button to open Pidge's and Hunk's canals, and their faces immediatly apparead. "You two, are you ok?" 

They both nodded, looking concerned by the situation, and Shiro tried again to scan the perimeter. _Where?_ The debris were too numerous and their size and colour and shape didn't allow them to find out if it was the blue lion or just the leftovers of the galra base. 

The idea of 'leftovers of the bue lion" hit Shiro's mind somehow and the picture burned his retina for a second. He swallowed. 

"Contact Allura and Coran!" Shiro hissed. His fingers were still working on the keyboard, trying to help the radar, trying to get it back to find the blue robot. Why was it working so perfectly with Keith, with Hunk, with Pidge? "They probably know how to--" 

He suddenly started. In his helmet, there was a soft buzz tickling his ears, coming from the open communication device. It wasn't from Red nor Yellow nor Green and his heart fastened right away at the idea. Was Lance trying to reach them? 

"Guys, can one of you get the call?" he asked. For a few seconds, he watched them manipulate the speackers area of their helmets, tying the few buttons hidden there.  
"Just a buzz," Pidge eventually said. "But there's something for sure. Wait, I'm trying something..."

The buzz sounded louder for a moment, making Shiro grimace at the unpleasant feeling as it was filling the cockpit. 

"Pidge, whatever you're doing, it doesn't--"

"--one?"

Shiro blinked, cuting himself out at the sound, weak and blurry, of the familiar voice. 

"--ease--answer!" 

It wasn't amazing, crackling like hell but it was _working_ and Shiro thanked Pidge quickly. 

"Lance? That's you? Lance?" 

Shiro wasn't sure if Lance could actually hear him -or them, he thought, but a glance at his monitor and the others faces on the screens just told him that they couldn't hear anything. Bless Pidge for that small innovation on their Lions, putting screens and cameras in their cockpits so they could see each others was something they needed from far. It had become reassuring, comforting, for Shiro, to know if they were fine. 

The speackers' buzz crackled again, but Shiro didn't miss the "Thanks god" that came out. Half relieved, Shiro leaned back on his seat. "Lance, can you hear me?" 

A sigh first answered. Then, Lance's voice filled his cockpit again and Shiro felt his heart taking a better pace. "I can-- _//shhrrrr//_ \--r you, Shiro." Even if it wasn't perfect, it was already a lot. 

"Are you ok?" he asked, voice slow to be sure that Lance could have all his words. It wasn't working so well on his side at the moment, so he wasn't sure if Lance could get everything. 

It took a few seconds for Lance to answer, some sounds reaching the microphone before. He was probably trying to make things better on his side too. "I'm ok. I _//shhhrrrr//_ hurt _//shhrrrr//_ a little but I guess _//shhrrrr//_ nothing, we'll see when we're back..."

Shiro frowned a little and the three gazes he earned reminded that he was still in a visual communication with the others. So, he just thumb up at them with a small smile, checking the com button to hear Lance better. _Where was the guy!?_

"Shiro?" The sudden stressed voice made him frowned. 

"Sorry," Shiro mumbled with a sigh. "It seems that the channel is a bit damaged. Where are you?" 

"I--"  
There was a break in Lance's voice and Shiro feared that the commnication was down again. 

"I don't know?" Lance sounded a bit lost, and Shiro couldn't get if that breathy voice was just his imagination. "There are debris all over, what happened?" 

Glancing at the screen, Shiro stared at the three other paladins. They still weren't reacting to anything but Shiro's voice; they couldn't hear Lance, or barely some words echoeing in he cockpit before falling in the helmet microphone. He wasn't even sure of that. 

"I must be the closest--" he murmured at first. 

But something suddenly cut him in his thoughts, a violent cough -a bad one, resonated in the black lion and Shiro knew that it wasn't Pidge, nor Hunk...Nor Keith. The hard breath that followed worryied him. 

"Hey! Lance! Are you really ok man?" 

"I'm ok!" His answer a bit too fast for Shiro's liking but well, Lance wasn't one to under react to that kind of thigs. Not like Keith. He heard Lance curse a little. "Nothin'g working for now," he added. "What about you?" 

Shiro sighed deeply again. "I was a bit farther, I wasn't hit by that shoot..." He remembered clearely tha blat, the light that emanated from the explosion. Lance's Lion taken in it and he gulped. "Oh man, you fucking scared me!" 

There was a short silence, during which Shiro wonderd if Lance's communication channel was down again, but a metalic sound in the speackers made him start and a strangled, restrained scream that reached his ears made him shiver with fear. Did the Galras...Were there still Galras!?

"Lance!?" he called again. 

"Hey Shiro, what's going on?" Keith voice came in the speackers, but for some reason Shiro was cared that someone else using the channel would fuck it up, and he wave at the camera to make the young man silent. 

Lance was quickly back. "Something bumped into my lion..." His voice was breathier than before, and he could hear all the insecurity in it, the pain present all over his words. "Please, don't yell Shiro, my ears are in fire, oh fucking god..." 

Shiro blinked at that. "Oh, uh, I--I'm sorry."

Having Lance joking a little, even if it was almost nothing, made Shiro a little more comfortable. But...He didn't like the situation, he didn't like Lance's hard breathing, he didn't like to hear that the young man was injured, even if it was only a little. He could hear the coughing, again and again -was there something in Lance cockpit that made him sick like that? A galra poison maybe? 

He should hurry. "I can't find you with my radar, how comes your that far?" 

"I--" There was a painful hiss and Shiro clenched his jaw at it. "Shit. I don't know. The blast must have projected Blue? There are...So much debris all around." Lance let out a sound, like a muffled, choked chuckle, but Shiro knew somehow that it had nothing to see. 

"Debris, you said?" he repeated. 

Lance had been so close to the base, so, so, so close. Shiro didn't even know how Lance still could be _alive_ after such a shock wave, such a explosion that had blown his lion. Or, probably, the blue lion was what had protected Lance. 

Lance's voice came out again. "Y-yeah. L-like...A lot..." But something was wrong with the guy and Shiro's mind immediatly raced. 

"Lance?" he tried. "You sound weird, are you reall--"

 _\--Really ok?_ was what he wanted to ask, but Lance cut him out pretty quickly "T--talk to me!" and the tremor, the sudden fear in his tone, the shaking he could hear, everything took him off guard and made him shiver with anxiety. 

"Lance, dude, what's happening?" he tried, smoothening his voice as much as possible. He knew for sur that being alone in that situation wasn't a casual thing. He hoped that Lance wasn't having a panic attack or something; he wasn't sure if one of them could help the boy to go through it. Pidge, maybe? But somehow he was pretty sure that only her body was feminine, her behaviour was rather more masculine than Hunk's, so let's not talk about her abilities at being all soft and understanding to take care of Lance in this situation. 

Lance's voice soon echoed in the speackers. It was breathy. "I--"

A creaking sound, the leather of the seat under Lance's body probably, was all that followed and Shiro waited patiently a second. Then two. Three. It was already too long. 

"Lance?" he called. 

There was nothing anymore. No sound anymore. "Hey, Lance!" 

"Shiro, what happens?" 

The man started at Keith's voice in the speackers of his helmet; he'd completly forgotten about the others' presence as he was talking to Lance. 

"I don't hear him anymore," Shiro hissed between his gritted teeth. "LANCE!" 

"Shiro," Pidge suddenly said, catching his attention. "You're the only one who can somehow get to his channel, it's probably because you're the closest to his position! His lion must be out for a while, you know it can happen sometimes--" 

"So what?" he almost growled, then the sour taste of guilt made him bite back his words with a sorry look to the screen. Pidge only shrugged it off -she didn't really mind about people's reactions as long as she wasn't concerned. 

"Try to get closer, I'm working on inserting some more codes for the screen thing, you know it's not fully functioning, that might be part of the reason..." 

"Yeah, thanks..." Shiro sighed deeply. He'd be loosing his cool in front of all of them, and it wasn't his usual being. But...

But Lance was still missing. 

"Did he say something?" Keith asked. The young man sounded worried enough to make Shiro shake his head. 

"Not really. He doesn't know where he is now...Just...A lot of debris all around?" 

He looked around his position again. _Where?_ They couldn't even try the thermo-radar if Lance's lion was out. But suddenly, amongst the asteroids and random debris of the base, Shiro managed to think about something. 

"Pidge! I'm going to the galra base!" 

She blinked as Shiro was already moving his lion, not even waiting for anyone to agree or disagree with him. None of them ould have said anything in such a situation.  
"Need someone to come?" Keith asked. 

"No. Stay where you are for now, I'll tell you if I have news, ok?" 

He'd probably lost something like a full minute and his brain was screaming like it was too long, too late. He hadn't any clue of what was going on for Lance, maybe he was overreacting? But he heard him. 

He heard Lance. He heard his call. 

Shiro managed to get another area of the asteroids belt, getting closer to the place where the base had explosed. There was still the biggest part, but no one could tell what it had been at first. A ship, a castle, anything. 

In her screen, Pidge was still styping as fast as she always did, with that concentrated face, nose slightly frowning under her round glasses, and she plitted her eyes a little at Shiro as he hissed with impatience, as for the fourth screen still being dark as for the fact he couldn't find Lance right away. 

"Two seconds, ok?" she mumbled. "Theeeere! Try again!" 

The screen only had grey parasites at first and he couldn't help but growl. In the cockpit, the crackling sound was suddenly back, hurting his ears through the loud buzz. "Lance! LANCE!" If only his voice could at least reach the young man. _If only._

The monitor suddenly moved and Shiro almost found himself jumping on the screen. The speackers weren't buzzing and crackling anymore. But the video wasn't what he'd expected and he was soon screaming Lance's name in the cockpit with the hope that it would make the body, motionless, move or something. 

"Lance! LANCE! ANSWER!" 

He finally saw it. Lance's shoulders jumped a little despite the paladin armor and his head raised a little. But it was also so...Slow? He wasn't even sure if Lance had really heard him this time. He hadn't said a single word yet. 

It was just unbearable. Coming from Lance, he meant, and it drove a full sting of fear yet nervousness run in his blood. 

"LANCE! FOR FUCK'S SAKE ANSWER ME!" 

Another move. Lance was looking at the camera in front of him, then probably the screen, blinking with a lost expression as he was processing what was going on. There was that small grin accross his face at first and the only thing that came out of his mouth was something that sounded like "Hey, handsome!" in a breathy, half sleepy half dead voice. It didn't suit Lance at all. It took Shiro a moment to get the two words, as Lance's tendancies to flirt with absolutly everything, with no regard for the species or genders, had probably been the first thing coming through his mind at that very moment. 

"What the--LANCE!" 

But that smile wasn't Lance's. It wasn't his voice, it wasn't his expression. The sudden pain coming accross Lance's face made Shiro paled and his eyes fell on what he could get from Lance's body despite the arm tightened around his waist. It was impossible to miss all that blood on the white and blue suit. It was impossible not to see the awful wound on Lance's side -even his arm couldn't actually hide it. 

Lance winced a little. "Seriously, Shiro, I told--urrh-told you not to scream--"

But it was too much. Shiro almost slapped his hands flat on his board. It _couldn't_ be. "WHY!?" was the only thing that came out, and the surprised and undone expression of Lance just killed him. 

Why? 

Why was it happening? 

Why couldn't it be, simply, Lance being a bit too dramatic about his condition, like he always did? 

"Minor injuries?" he hissed. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME LANCE!?" 

Lance grimaced even more, and Shiro didn't know at all if it was from the pain or the yelling hurting his ears. 

"Shiro, you found him?" Keith's voice was here in his helmet, but the idea that his friend, his -almost a- brother could make him miss a word of Lance made his stomach twist awfully and he just made a face that, he hoped, didn't looked to hard on Keith. 

"Shit." was what Lance's sighed was made of. 

Shiro checked his radar again, still coming as close as he could from the major impact of their battle. Somehow, it was working better; he could see Lance, talk to him again, so he _HAD_ to be near. He _HAD_ to...

"I'm coming, Lance, don't pass out again!"

This time, Lance wasn't smiling. He wasn't even trying, and his tired, painful gaze just matched perfectly the way his body was injured. "I'll--do my best--" came out so low that it scared Shiro even more. 

"Don't give up, buddy, okay?"

"Mh--"

"Listen to me, okay?" 

Shiro could feel his own breath trapped in his throat. He had to be at Lance's sides on time. He had to, he fucking had to. 

Not even a second had passed and he noticed how heavy Lance's eyelids was, almost closing again and a shudder of horror took him right away. 

"LISTEN TO ME LANCE, OPEN YOUR EYES!" 

There sudenly was a squeacky noise, a small beep that caught his ears and he immediatly jumped on his radar. _THERE._

"Ah, yeah--" 

It sounded like a gust of wind and Shiro started to miss Lance's unbearable verbal puking. 

"I've found you, your lion has drifted due to the blast I think, hold on!"

The young man had a faint smile lingering in the corner on his mouth, not even revealing his teeth, for a second as he was hardly opening his eyes and Shiro wasn't sure what was the worse. The blood on his chin, his lost gaze, the way he was fighting not to give in? 

"Shit, I want to sleep."

Shiro almot jumped.

"Your eyes, Lance!" He shivered again. "LOOK AT ME, BOY! ME! FOCUS ON ME! Don't leave me, Lance! DON'T FUCKING LEAVE ME!"

"I lookt at you, like, see...I could do this forever?" Lance had whispered, and a soft laughters, a chuckle, made him move. He shouldn't have, Shiro thought when the next thing he was watching was Lance coughing even more, his hands pressing hard to his waist in a vain attempt to suppress the pain with another one, hissing awfully. His eyebrows were tightened in a thin line, eyes hardly focusing on his screen. That gaze, too, wasn't Lance. Everything here wasn't the young boy. 

"That's great, Lance!" he murmured. 

Or rather, it was a version of Lance he had never seen. 

He gulped. No. Not 'never'. He'd already seen it, but it was slightly different that time. 

"Hey, Shiro?" 

Lance's voice was just to tired, and the man didn't know how to take it better. Talking, and making him talk as much as possible for him not to leave him again was just the best thing to do at the moment. 

"What?Talk, buddy, it'll keep you awake!" 

There was a sigh, a short one and Lance winced a little. 

"I'm--sorry--?" It sounded hard to talk, he was stopping every two words or so. Or maybe hesitation was leading his voice. It was weird. Shiro had rarely seen Lance _hesitate_ while talking before. 

For a second, Shiro watched Lance's eyes alternate between the camera and the screen, looking for something. There was such a need in his gaze, like he didn't manage to get what he wanted at that very moment and Shiro couldn't stare away from his face, cold sweat sliding along his spine under his space suit. 

What was Lance looking for, right now, a he could be about to _die_? What could be more important than _talking to him_ to make it to the end _alive_? 

"Tell Allura...That I'm sorry, at least--"

If Lance's request was weird at first, Shiro didn't really listen to it at first. There was so much more important to think right now. 

"Oh shit shit shit, don't pass out Lance! Focus, man! Stay with me! I'm almost there, ok? I'm coming, I'm coming for you! Stop saying such things like you won't make it! OPEN YOUR EYES, HEY!" He was yelling, could feel Keith and Pidge and Hunk's terrified eyes on him through the screens as he was the only one to actually see, listen to and talk to Lance. They didn't know what was really happening. They could only imagine. And Shiro was pretty sure that they didn't even get a half of how bad the situation was. 

The painful grimace Lance gave him was jut heartbreaking. Because, well...Shiro perfectly knew that the boy didn't intend to make such a face at that moment, but his body was just being so honest with himself. 

His expression changed as quick as possible. Honesty was, after all, reaching his brain and Shiro wasn't sure if it was a good thing. Eyes widening, mouth slightly parted in a gasp, that fear all over his face--

The beep came again, made Shiro start and reach the radar monitor. _Finally_. 

"Hurry--Hurry up, Shiro--" murmured Lance's breathless voice. 

Oh shit. _No_. Shiro felt his stomach twitch again at the sound, at the view he had. Lance barely made a move. His head was resting against the seatback, slitghly tilted backward. His chest was moving slowly, up, down, up, down, with that noisy and breathless respiration he had. 

"Lance!" 

Lance gasped a little at his voice. It was the best he could do. Calling him, watching him, talking to him. _Making him talk_. Hearing his voice. "I see blue, I'm here, okay!?" Shiro couldn't recognize his own voice, rough and desperate. Lance wasn't so far, the blue lion had appeared on his view. It was just--

A soft sob put a alert somewhere in his mind and he immediatly focused back on Lance. Through the helmet, through the blue-ish glass of the paladin armor thingy that Lance always tought was ' _so cool_ ', Shiro met the broken face again. It wasn't Lance, he could swear. And at the same time, it was him, so openly, so truly him. That mad, painful and sobbing mad was all of a part of Lance that no one knew but him. 

"I need you--" 

Lance closed his eyes, again, hands pressing so hard on his waist that Shiro thought for a second that his fingers were going to dig into his wounds soon. Biting hard on his lip, Shiro tried to concentrate on the piloting of Black; driving between the debris and asteroids to get to the blue lion was more difficult than he though at first, and he was quite glad that he was alone to do so. If they had been more, it would have been a hecatomb for sure. 

When Shiro was about to yell again at Lance, the young man exhaled, breath trembling so much, eyes bright. "Please, I need you so much--"

He sniffed, and his eyes opened again, his pupils sliding on the left, on the right with an even more lost looks as tears were rolling from the corner of his eye. "--Ah shit--I'm crying--?" he whined pitifully, but Shiro was all about to jump on his screen. 

But, commands in hands, he couldn't. Instead, his voice reaching a new level of...He didn't know what. But his own voice sounded even more desesperate than Lance's. Or in another way. "FUCKING CRY, LANCE! I don't mind! Cry! Talk to me, do anything, look at me, I don't know but don't fucking close your eyes!" Because yeah, Lance could cry as much as he needed, call him as much as possible, he didn't mind if he could make it to the castle and go to that fucking healing cab in the end. 

_He had to_. 

Somehow, it made Lance laugh a little -his chuckle sounded awful. "Hey, Shiro--?" he called, voice low. 

Shiro frowned at him through the camera, trying to get every part of Lance's looks. He wasn't sure if Lance was still crying or not, it was like every of his emotions was showing one by one. 

"Sometimes...There are things we can't get, y'know?" 

Shiro felt his heart ache too much at Lance's words. He didn't like the idea of hearing something like 'his last words' when he was getting so close to the blue lion now. He swallowed thickly. Ah, his throat was so dry. "What, Lance? What is it that you wanted?" 

For a second, Shiro thought that Lance was simply sinking into the only sound of his voice. But he probably just felt so bad that he had to pause so often, had to gather himself together not to lose and fall. 

"Not sure...Which one I...Really wanted the most..."

At that moment, Shiro wanted to yell again at Lance, yell that he could get everything he wanted later, when he'd be safe in their altean castle. But for now, he just couldn't. Lance needed to talk to him. 

No. It was different, probably. Surely. 

Shiro needed Lance to talk to him. 

"Tell me all of them! All!" 

The soft chuckle ecchoed in his cockpit, along with the short, soft " _You_ \--" that followed, low and breathless, and the silence after that suddenly sounded like the heaviest thing Shiro'd heard. 

The _silence_. 

"L-Lance?" 

His eyes were closed, again. "LANCE! LANCE, HEY! TALK AGAIN! TELL ME ! TELL ME, MAN! TELL ME, TALK TO ME! LANCE! FUCK, LANCE, ANSWER, DON'T YOU DARE GO!" 

Lance didn't move at the sound of his voice, head bowed foreward, his chin resting on his chest armor. Was it too late? Did he have some time? Shiro couldn't tell. He just knew that his lion had stopped near the blue one and like that, it was easy to fly to the giant and metallic mouth of the other robot. He felt on the edge of something, couldn't figure what it was. His hands were shaking, just so much. 

"LANCE!"

Lance was here. He saw the back of the seat, the shape of his elbow on the armrest. But if at first it was like a relief to see that he was really _here_ , the sudden smell of blood hit his nose hard. It was awful and reminded him the reality. 

Lace wasn't answering back. 

He didn't have much _time_ and it made him feel so sick. 

"Sorry Blue," he said, and he felt like the machine was vibrating to answer him. "I'm taking your paladin with me, you'll have to make it by yourself to the castle..." 

It was like a soft and metallic purr that filled the air, and suddenly there was no gravity anymore in the cockpit, and it took Shiro by surprise. How came, he wondered for half a second, but in the end he put the thougth aside and didn't mind as he was pushing himelf closer, helping by catching any part of the cockpit walls to bring him in closer to the chair -not ther was so many room, but he didn't want to use his backpack _in_ the cockpit and the sudden absence of gravity wasn't helping much. 

When he could make it to the boy, his heart poundered hard and fast with fear and pain at the view. _Dears, no_.  
"Hey, Lance!"  
Watching it accross a bad screen was a thing. Having Lance like that, under his hands was the worst. Gravity might had been what took the body in place -Lance wasn't really one to fcking put a security belt around himself, even if their lion seats owned a small one and even him, Shiro, had to admit that he didn't quite use it a lot to keep free of any movement. He was already floating a little above the cockpit seat, legs limp, but his arms were still tight around his waist. 

Shiro caught a calve first, taking the body easily down against him and he instantly knew that Blue was just trying the two men. Shiro knew that gravity had still be when he was talking to Lance; it held the young pilot in place on his seat despite his wounds. But now, Blue knew that they didn't need it anymore, that it would be so much easier to take Lance if they weren't blocked with his weight and it'd desactivated it. 

Lions had always been the best thing ever made in the space. 

Beside the fact that it was mainly used for _war_. 

Hands going up on Lance's body to have a good hold on him -more than just his calve, thanks- Shiro sucked in a breath when his fingers passed the awful wound. The suit was ripped at that part, blood almost running dark for being denied for so long, the white fabric ruined for mot on it all over Lance's waist. Front. 

Back. 

Something must have hit him so bad during the impact, something broken from the cockpit that was probably floating in the aire at the moment, covered with blood. But for now, he had more important thoughts. Slidding a finger under Lance's helmet, he found the small button that closed completly the protective glass. The change of oxygen, turning to something smoother in the inside of the helmet, must be something; a soft whimper escalated Lance's mouth a few seconds after, as Shiro was trying to operate so they could get off the lion. It startled him a little to see how bad his condition was -but at the same time he as relieved to see that he was still _alive_. For now. His hold on the body got stronger but shaky, both arms circling Lance as much as he could. 

Precautiously, he managed to get back to his lion, Lance tightly wrapped between his arms, and it wasn't the easiest thing to do after all. Lance's body was litterally limp, head almost bobbling weirdly every time Shiro had to fly short aside in order to avoid debris to his black lion. He had to hold Lance's neck with his other arm, trying as much as possible to secure the young man, and soon the door of Black closed behind them. It was a narrow place for two people, especially when Shiro needed to hold Lance with him. Black, on instinct, had done the same than Blue right when Shiro was back: gravity was disactivated, allowing the two men to get easier in the cockpit. 

"Shiro! You're back, how is--EW!" 

Keith's voice resonated in his helmet and Shiro narrowed his eyes at the body barely floating at a few centimeters from his laps. Lifting a hand, he circled Lance's body with his arm to maintain him against his chest, careful not to touch the bloody parts and let his fingers linger in his neck, checking for his pulse everytime he was looking down on the injured body. 

Silent, they had all observed Shiro. Pidge had let a soft but high pitchy noise at the view of Lance when Shiro had settled both them on the seat. 

"Shiro! Is he--" 

Hunk didn't finish his sentence, visibly troubled -and Shiro would never blame him for that. His own fingers were shaking against Lance's throat, the slow but persisting pulse pounding against his fingertips. 

He shook his head at the camera. "We have to rush. I--I'm going, ok guys?" 

They nodded, then concentrated on the way to the castle. Moving slowly, Shiro cursed between his teeth as he was taking the commands of the lion. Gravity was back for a less than a minute, helping a little now to set Lance's weight on him. The blue paladin still had his helmet protecting his head, but Shiro had released his face from the glass by a light pressure on the small button set on the side. 

"What happened?" Keith's voice suddenly ecchoed in his ears, and Shiro relaxed a little. He couldn't get over the tension from the situation. With Lance's body in his arms and the boy's blood spreading more and more on his black and white armor, Shiro juste couldn't calm down. 

"I'm not sure," he breathed. "Something in his cockpit, I guess..." 

He didn't really mind for now. They would check for the reason later. At the moment, he had to speed up if he wanted Lance to _live_. His heart hadn't sped down at all, his thoughts racing as much as possible. It was the second time. It was the second time he was here, holding the blue paladin for dear life, praying for him to die soon. But this time, he wasn't sure of anything. He couldn't tell if they would get on time to the castle, to the healing cab and if Lance would actually make it. And be back to his _normal_ self. 

"At least, he's with you," Keith sighed. "He's safe for now."  
"Keith--" 

"You're the safer _place_ I know, if I have to say." 

Shiro didn't answer to this, only pressing his lips together in a thin line. 

During his flight, it happened that Lance moved. Once. Twice. His head was resting against Shiro's shoulder, body weighting heavily against the top of his own. 

And a soft whimper reached his ear, something so low that he only could hear it because Lance's mouth was just a few centimeters away, and Shiro turned his face to the cuban boy. 

"Lance?" he tried, not giving much voice, trying to get his cool back. Somehow, he felt that if he looked too carried by his feelings, by what was happening, that Lance would immediatly react, so badly. 

Slowly, a pair of dark blue eyes appeared from under heavy an half closed eyelids meeting his gaze for barely a second, but Shiro had already found himself holding his breath, staring at Lance. Teeth gritted and a small grimace of pain on his features, the young man exhaled softly. "Oh man...I must be in...Heaven, angels are...Already here...To pick me up..." 

A bit confused, Shiro forgot his anxiety for a second at Lance's everyday attempt of flirting. It usually wasn't on _him_. "Excuse-me?" 

Lance didn't open his eyes -he coughed instead, eyebrows slightly frowning and the shaking it sent to his body made him wince and moan. Immediatly, Shiro tightened his grip on Lance. 

"Shhhh, it's ok Lance, it's ok," he murmured. "We'll be home soon, right?" 

_"Home...?"_

It was a soft whisper and suddenly, Shiro knew he'd made a mistake. _Home_ was something Lance was craving, so badly. He couldn't take it back, he couldn't take the risk for Lance to lose a reason to hold on and make it to the _castle_ actually. 

"Y-yeah. Home." He was lying and the bitter taste of it lingered on his tongue like some galra acidic. He swallowed slowly, taking his own words in, trying not to think about the harsh breath resonating near his cheek. But...Wasn't the castle like their actual home? Shiro needed to hang on those thoughts sometimes. They didn't know when all of this would end. Nor how. Nor when. 

"Sounds...Cool..." Lances murmured and the shadow of a smile lingered on his lip, not even a second but Shiro had caught it. He sighed, trying to ignore that feeling of guilt building quickly in his stomach. 

"Yeah," he repeated. "Sounds cool, really." 

Lance shivered against him. Their armors met a little more, the smooth plates of protection emitting a disgraceful sound. "You're ok?" Shiro asked with concern, and the question just sounded so out of it, with Lance's blood all over his stomach armor, but still, he had to ask. He just had to. 

Hearing Lance's voice, right now, was like a blessing after he thought the man wouldn't talk anymore. 

"I'm...Fucking co...Cold..." Lance managed to say. 

Shit. 

The heat in the cockpit was, mot of the time, unbearable due to their suits and armors and it was even worse due to the adrenalina of the battled. Shiro knew for sure that his cockpit was all but cold, and it drew back that fear for Lance's condition. 

"I know, buddy," he lied, again, but there was not much to do at the moment. For a second, he considered his fingers, hand still resting on Lance's chest armor mst of the time, and suddenly bite the tip of the glove, pulling it out of his hand with his teeth before diging his fingers in Lance turtle neck under the helmet. He gulped. Oh, it was cold. So cold, so cold here and it was awfully scary again. 

But Lance made a soft and comfy sigh through his cold shaking. "Man, that's hot..." He mumbled, and Shiro bite his own bottom lip this time. He didn't want to think about what was going to happen next. 

Lance shifted a little on his knees, and suddenly a weak hand reached for Shiro's wrist. The fingers of the glove were sticky with coagulated blood and the feeling on his skin wasn't truly appealing, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he let Lance do. He wasn't even sure if the other paladin was truly aware of what he was doing right now. 

" 'Ro, I..." 

Shiro's arm in Lance's back took a better hold around his shoulders, aware of the way Lance had barely been able to say his name, cutting it for a short 'ro'. "Yeah?" 

Lance's grip, if he would have had all his abilities, would have probably gone stronger. The blue pupils came in sight slowly again, and Shiro gulped at the sight of the watery eyes and the distess reflecting in them. 

"I'm...So...So scared..." 

Shiro's jaw clenched, his fingers in Lance's neck tensed against the skin, and he caressed gently, lightly, with the hope that it would appease Lance, even just a little.  
"I'm here," he murmured. "I'm here, don't worry." 

Lance didn't open his eyes after that. Hand tightly gripped around Shiro's wrist, he'd passed out again, breath unsteady as hell. In the end, Black had made it by itelf to the castle, Shiro being unable to drive while taking care of Lance. 

When he reached the castle and his feet touched the hangar's floor, he was still carrying Lance, unable to undo the grip of the weak fingers. It had been a tear to take his own hand off the dark fabric of the collar. 

But soon, they had taken Lance away from him for the best, and only Allura had stayed by his side. She was silent, eye focusing on the healing cab where Lance's body was floating. 

Shiro finally let out a deep sigh. "Lance...He wanted to apologise." 

"Really?" 

"To you." 

She let her gaze drop to the floor. "I already know..." 

It was a little like he'd missed something. Lance's behaviour and words, Allura's reaction... 

"Allura," he tried. "Did something happen?" 

She softly shook her head. Her long and thin fingers traced a puzzled pattern on the thick glass of the cabin. "Nothing happened, Shiro, I'm afraid." 

But then, she smiled gently, giving him a long and warm gaze. 

"Thank you for bringing Lance home." 

Shiro nodded slowly. 

But it wasn't _home_. 

And somehow, he'd promised Lance to take him back out there. _Home_. 

For _real_. 

And he _would_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are. Things are a bit safer now! ;D A third part for the serie will be started soon! Really, I hope that you liked it, tell me if you did <3 !

**Author's Note:**

> Here we are, I'm already working on the second chapter! 
> 
> Did you like? Or not? What did you think? Or anything? Don't hesitate, leave your comments and everything! >w


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